Dear all,
The nightmares
that befall my family are almost over. At least so, should I think? Because this
is how life is and we have to move on. I still can’t believe it happened. But
this is inevitable. Everyone must meet the same fate. It left a huge void that
nothing can fill. Visiting that empty space in the heart I feel terrible. One
month passed without her and it feels like years on end. But we will let go,
for she should be reborn amongst beings in higher realms or at least amongst us
because I feel we have unexpressed feelings, unsaid words and unfinished
business.
When this
misfortune struck us, I felt we would be in the dark all alone. But I was wrong,
help and support came from all corners. How I wish I could repay your helping
hands and words? It meant so much for me and my family in the testing of times.
It was overwhelming to know that sense of community is stronger than I have
ever imagined in Mongar.
I have
reached the place only days later but by then everything is in great order.
Even after my arrival the support have been unprecedented, for all of these I am
immensely grateful to; Kadam rimpoche and his zhelops, Kilikhar shedra and
dzongkhag rabdey for all the blessings and sungchoes. Dasho dzongda and his
administration, DEO sir and his department, Mongar Regional Referral Hospital
and its staff, Mongar lower secondary school and its teachers, Mongar Higher
secondary school and teachers, business
community of Mongar town, parents of school children, throema tshogpa of Mongar,
neighbors at MLSS teachers colony, friends and relatives from all over the
places. You held my hands, you tucked my heavy heart, you lessened my sorrows
and above all you lighted my dark world.
Today only
thing I can do is look back and be glad that on the longest and most difficult
journey of my life you all were there for me. Such tragedies may not happen to
everyone but everyone who undergoes such situations may not be as fortunate as
us to benefit from such a cohesive community. If not for your sincere help and
unwavering support, we would not have conducted the rites and rituals as
expected.
I wish I
could rip out my heart to show you how humbled I am. But then in reality only
thing that I can do right now is offer these hollow words, albeit sincere. It’s
unrealistic if I say I know all of you who have come to my rescue by name but I
remember all of you by your face and where you work. Now I am praying that in
life let me cross your path and I be of some help to all of you. I owe you so
much more.
I remember
the cash you have contributed. I know kinds you have delivered. I remember
flags you have hoisted. I remember butter lamps you have made and lit. I
remember calls you have made. I remember cars you have given. I remember your
endurance in smoke to cook. I remember servings that you have done. If not for
your contributions, stories would have been totally different. My family will
remember these till the end. These memories will seat deep in our hearts. In
time I wish we will repay these well-intended acts of kindness in full with
love.
Today as I think
and brood over the unimaginable loss in my life, in the confines of my hostel
room, my heart murmurs with the gratefulness to all the people who came
together and lightened up the darkness. My grievance shied away thinking about
the immense support and gewa that we could together perform. Should the
departed soul look back from dead, she must be glad at what we together did.
49 day
rituals are yet to be conducted and I have no doubt teacher colleagues and
neighbors will see it through.
Today I sign
off with a grateful heart with a hope to see you all in a months’ time.
Sincerely
Namgay
Wangchuk
Shimla
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